Monday, June 14, 2021

CHAPTER 155: IMPRESSIONS OF MY LIFE: AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A RECHERCHE POET SECOND HALF SPEAKING IN NEW ORLEANS 1984

CHAPTER 155 SPEAKING IN NEW ORLEANS. 1984


 


My involvement soliciting funds for The United Way was something paradoxical. For most of my life I had been resentful and critical of The United Way. This attitude went back to when I worked for ARCo in the 1960s. ARCo supported the United Way and every year they solicited funds from the employees. They were very heavy handed. You were expected to pledge “Your fair share” to the cause. Now whether you did this or not was supposed to be a matter of free will. It was also supposedly confidential; no one would know if you gave or not, or how much…or so the company claimed. (The photograph above right was taken by me.)


I didn’t give anything. I didn’t make a pledge of so much weekly from my paycheck nor did I even make a token one-time donation. I had my own charities I gave to. I also didn’t like being pressured to give to something that essentially gave the company a nice public image. ARCo wasn’t doing this because they cared about the agencies on the list. The company President or Chairman wanted to stand up at the end of the campaign banquet and be handed a plaque to hang on ARCo’s trophy wall. They wanted the comment about their generous contribution splashed about in the Philadelphia papers. 


So I pledged nothing. Then one day I came to work and I’m
approached by a guy I didn’t know and told to report to some conference room. I go in the room and there are  three guys from the Atlantic Independent Union waiting for me. These guys surrounded me and their yelling at me for not giving, and telling me I better give my Fair Share. It was like a scene from some mob movie. They were big guys, too, probably worked down at the refinery or maybe they were the same goons who showed up from the Teamsters in my office at Olson Brothers. And how did they know I didn’t give anything; it was supposed to be confidential.



I told them, “Fuhgeddaboudit!”  No I didn’t actually say that. I did tell them my charity giving was my business, then I got up and left the room. Sorry if I ruined the companies 100% participation. I really  expected I might be jumped on the street somewhere after that, but nothing more ever happened. I also swore I would never give to The United Way. Now, here I was not only making a contribution, but standing up in front of groups of people making speeches asking for their money. I do have to say, Wilmington Trust never put any kind of undo pressure on their employees to give and the list of donors was strictly kept secret.


On January 23 of 1984 I was picking up Laurel from nursery school and my car brakes began to fail. I took the car to the mechanic I used and dropped it off. Laurel and I  had to walk two-miles home. The next morning, I got my car back at 8:30 AM, which made me late for work. Laurel didn’t go to school. She was still tired out from the walk.


On the 26th I bought a new car, a Ford LTD Station wagon. We had


truly arrived at that point, the suburban family. 


On Saturday the 28th I left a chilly Philadelphia airport for New Orleans. It was the annual BAI P.A.T.H Conference, now called the BAI Productivity Conference and this year of 1984 there was a difference. No, not the name change.


I was one of the speakers.


 



 Over the course of my first years at Wilmington Trust my name gradually began to be known. Originally my fame, if you want to call it that, seeped throughout the bank. My job had started as an experiment, really, which no one quite knew how to do. I was designing my own job descriptions and creating just what Project Management in Banking should look like. I had started working at The Bank (as we referred to ourselves) on September 3, 1980. By the end of 1983 I had controlled 18 major projects and not only brought every single one in before the scheduled completion dates, but also brought them in under budget. A few of these weren’t overly complex, but many required gaining confidence and cooperation beyond our own Division. It took diplomacy to bring the management of different divisions together.


People within our bank were actually talking about me at meetings and conferences in the industry beyond Wilmington Trust. This was not just because of my ability to accomplish the goals set forth, but because I sometimes brought a new way of doing them to the table, for example, the Bulk Filing Conversion.


I was an aggressive project Manager, as well. I was always suggesting projects at budget time, which quite often were rejected because no one else was ready to see the possibilities. Still, I got talked about. Project Management was now becoming a buzz word around the banking industry, although it remained a mystery to a lot of old-line managers. Thus in the last quarter of 1983 I was asked by the BAI to put together a presentation (what they called A Breakout Session) for the 1984 Conference on Project Management in Banking. I choose the title, “Project Management Works!” and sent my synopsis to the BAI content committee. 


How did a country boy with Social Anxiety Disorder ever pull this off. I had my bad moments, but overall I seemed to have been born for this job. My fears of social situations were offset by my gift of organization and my preparation. These were very much gifts from God.


 New Orleans was fun, even though I was all on my own. I flew in on Saturday. On Sunday I took both a bus tour of the city and a steamboat cruise down the Mississippi. I loved the city, but was disappointed by the Mississippi. The Mississippi just didn’t seem all that large where I was. I realize it is the longest U.S. waterway and a major course of transportation through many a state. But I was used to living near the Delaware River and somehow the Delaware looked wider than the Mississippi in New Orleans. Actually, this is true. The Delaware River where I am from is almost 3 miles across. The Mississippi in New Orleans is 2 miles wide.



Anyway, I rank New Orleans as one of my favorite cities because it is a great walker’s city. My favorite cities are all walker cities: Philadelphia, New York and New Orleans. You can walk about these places even at night and feel safe because there are so many people about. I would put Washington DC on my  list, except there is something about it that isn’t comfortable after dark.


In New Orleans  I was once more hitting the marathon circuit. I am
not a marathon runner, but it  seemed if there was one, I was there.





 I stayed at the New Orleans Sheraton, just a short walk from the heart of the French Quarter, and I was in the French Quarter about every evening. Every morning I would get up early and saunter down to Decatur Street to the Café Du Monde and get a couple Beignets and

some café au lait. Ah, it was a little bit of Heaven. I have missed those Beignets all these years I have been home.


My session was late morning on the first day of the conference. I had designed my presentation to involve the audience. Unfortunately, the lighting in the room was terrible and I struggled reading my own script, which I think confused some of the people. 



The BAI treated all the speakers to dinner at Arnaud’s 
Restaurant.This establishment has an extensive Mardi Gras Museum inside and we were given a personal tour. The food was excellent.


They served Shrimp as an appetizer. It was a huge tray of shrimp in a Creole Remoulade Sauce. This was the only time I ate shrimp and enjoyed
  it. I am not a big fan of seafood.

Shrimp always reminded me ofbig bugs, and speaking of big bugs, the Cicadas are a close relative. Cicadas are eaten, too, but not by me.
 



Instead I had no more fish.  I had Filet Mignon au Poivre. Why not, the BAI was paying for it. Several of the other speakers near me told me they had attended my session and really enjoyed it. I was surprised since I didn’t think it went well due to the lighting.


 The next night I was alone for dinner and ate in the Hotel
restaurant. I still wasn’t paying, the Bank was paying for this meal. I had a table sort of toward the middle of the room, unusual since I had found restaurants usually sat lone diner a bit out of the way. As I enjoyed my drink, a woman approached and asked if she could join me. She was young and pretty. She explained she was attending from Pittsburgh National and hated eating alone. We talked about 


Information Technology, of all things. As we neared the end of our meals it became obvious she did not want to go back to her hotel room alone. As we got up, she invited me to join her. I turned her down. I have had opportunities, but I never had and never  would cheat on my wife. There was one time I came close, but we’ll get to that later.



I had been propositioned even before her during my stay at the Sheraton. The second night I was there two prostitutes entered the elevator with me. They got turned down as well.


The conference ended on February 1. I came home on the 2nd, a Thursday. 



That weekend Lois and I went away while my parents took the kids

.

We had a celebration for Laurel on Sunday the 26th. On Monday my wife went back to working. She has been home quite a while after the children were born, but money was getting tight and she decided to return to the ranks of the employed.


She was able to get a position in the Data Preparation Division of
Wilmington Trust as an encoder. She ran into a couple obstacles. First was a company policy rule, wives were not supposed to work in the same area as their husbands. Walt went to bat for us on this one and Personnel decided there was enough separation between my position and hers and allowed the hire. However, the Supervisor of the Encoding Unit was dubious whether Lois could do the job or not. Lois is left-handed and all the encoders were made for right-handers. My wife got the job and proved to be one of the best encoders they had.


The big draw back for us was I worked the day shift and she worked the evening. We would literally pass going between. But she got to be there for the kids all day and I took over at night, so they never needed day care. It also tended to wear her out going in and  working so late. Her hours were from 6:00 PM to Finish. She never knew what time she would get home. Some days it was early, but some days she was there until dawn. Other then this shift difference, life got back to being fairly normal. In April Lois met my mom and grandmother at Granite Run Mall and had the children’s photographs taken (left).



  On April 14 I attended training called “Counselor Relations”. Sometime around this time of that year I also attended The Writers Group Workshop. I think I had more interest in that than the Counselor stuff.



And then came April 1984 and the whole world was about to change…again.


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